by Bruno Borges, Men’s Minister
Our mission at Living Hope is to proclaim God’s truth as we journey with those seeking sexual wholeness through a more intimate relationship with Christ. Our prayer is that through God’s love, grace, and truth, we can take our people by the hand and help them go from knowing Jesus to further understanding who He is and who they are in Him. The secular world calls what we do “conversion therapy” and, from time to time, will raise false accusations and threats in an attempt to intimidate us. We certainly don’t do any therapy as we are ministers, not counselors. But if the allegations are geared towards helping people convert from darkness to light by pointing them to Jesus, then I would claim we are guilty as charged. I point this out because this is the same kind of intimidation the Church has faced regarding discipling those who struggle with unwanted sexual distortions. However, these intimidations are only as powerful as we allow them to be. I will argue in this article the real reasons why I believe Christians, pastors, and leaders may be giving in to these outside secular noises that are keeping them silent and feeling ill-equipped to disciple in the area of sexuality. But first, allow me to encourage you with Jesus’ words when He said, “Blessed are you when others revile you and persecute you and utter all kinds of evil against you falsely on my account. Rejoice and be glad, for your reward is great in heaven, for so they persecuted the prophets who were before you” (Matt. 5:11-12).
Journeying with anyone is no easy task; it takes time, commitment, laughs, tears, and a lot of crying out to the Lord. But no job is as rewarding! There is no better way to witness the transformative power of the Gospel than to walk closely with someone. They are changed, and so are we! As Christians, we are all called to embark on a discipleship journey with the people God has already placed in our lives. Most of us yearn for such an experience as it comes with fellowship and a safe space for the vulnerability we all need. You see, the challenge in discipleship is not the lack of opportunity or even starting it; the challenge is always persevering amid the inevitable roadblocks that will appear in our path. However, when we understand our mission and end goals, we are strengthened to remain on the path and finish well.
When we talk about journeying with those who are sexually broken, the topic is daunting because we are also talking about ourselves. The reality is that God created every human as a sexual being and, therefore, has struggled, still struggles, and is prone to once again struggle with sexual distortions.1 In general, this is a hard truth to face, especially for Christians as the Church, for the most part, has become accustomed to the idea that somehow Christ-followers do not or should not struggle sexually. This mindset results from gnostic philosophies that have influenced the Church to somehow separate sexuality from spirituality. It derives from the idea that the spirit is good while the flesh is evil, creating a dualistic mindset that does not correspond to God’s design for sexuality.2 Consequently, we have asked the world to keep sexuality to themselves while we, the Church, will keep spirituality to ourselves.
Two problems immediately arise from the separation described above: First, when we attempt to separate sexuality and spirituality, we struggle with coming to terms with how we may still struggle with sexual distortions. We use our only tool, spirituality, to over-spiritualize the situation, which ends up solving nothing. In most cases, it makes things worse, as many people tend to abandon the faith as they cannot comprehend why they prayed so much, and God did not deliver or heal them from their sexual struggles. As for those who remain in the faith, many may never seek the help they need for fear of what others may think or the possibility they would lose their ministries and dignity, especially if they are a pastor or leader in the Church. Rather than receiving help, they hide, secretly indulging in sin until they cross a boundary they never thought they would and eventually get caught.
Second, when we have a Church composed of closeted sexual strugglers influenced by ancient non-biblical philosophies, the result will most likely be a Church that reacts condemningly every time someone falls short in sexual sin. Such a response is a classic reaction of someone who may withhold helping someone for an area in which they have not experienced victory or struggle with the fear of being exposed.
I bring all of this up because my goal is to awaken the Church to respond biblically and redemptively to all issues about sexuality through ongoing discipleship. However, the first step to accomplish this is to seek God’s strength to help us be vulnerable about our sexual difficulties. We must realize that we ALL have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God (Rom. 3:23). But also that nothing we have done can separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord (Rom. 8:38-39).
As I journey with the men at Living Hope, I see what Jesus is doing in their lives and experience His transformative power in my life. The more I have embraced the beauty of spiritual sexuality, the more I have discovered His design is far more significant and purposeful than any distortion I have ever struggled with. I am beyond thankful for the men and women who have embarked on a discipleship journey with me. They have constantly pointed me toward Jesus during smooth and bumpy paths. As a result, the more I experience the intimacy of a relationship with Jesus, the more I have yearned to share my experience with others in joining them on their journey. Jesus is still on the move restoring lives, to restore lives!
Bibliography
Platt, David. Counter Culture: Following Christ in an Anti-Christian Age. Tyndale House Pub, 2017.
Slattery, Juli. Rethinking Sexuality: God’s Design and Why It Matters. New York: Multnohah, 2018.
West, Christopher. Eclipse of the Body: How We Lost the Meaning of Sex, Gender, Marriage, and Family; and How to Reclaim It. Scottsdale, AZ: Totus Tuus Press, 2018.