by Bonnie White, Women’s Minister
Belonging, this is the very thing that every woman seeking out our ministry is longing for and hoping she might find. She may have been attracted to other girls ever since she can remember but has never acted on it or is realizing acting on these desires did not bring the fulfillment she thought it would. She may be trying her best to get out of an unhealthy relationship or simply seeking a sisterhood of healthy friends. She may have finally decided she cannot do this alone anymore, or she may have just met the Lord and is trying to discover who she REALLY is in Christ outside of any attractions she experiences. Though the reason may differ around sexual and relational brokenness, what she longs for and what you and I long for is a place to belong. A place where she can be known and loved as she is, brokenness and all—a place to finally fit in.
In our current individualistic society, where we can order anything we need or desire on an app and have everything delivered to our doorstep without ever interacting with another human being, this sense of belonging can seem further and further away from us. We live unseen and unacknowledged lives, but we were created to be known by others and in community with them. We were made to belong. If you are a person struggling with your sexuality, being known and loved within a community can be especially difficult.
It is hard in part because the LGBTQIA+ community exudes belonging. They shout, “Come, you can belong here. You can be celebrated here. You can have an identity here.” To a man or woman struggling with sexuality and identity, this message seems to fill the hunger in their hearts. No need to wrestle with unwanted feelings or feel alone anymore. In the LGBTQIA+ community, you can belong and fit in instantly. No work or investment is required. Just identify with us you are in. This offer can be hard to fight against when their hearts are hungry to belong.
Finding deep, rich belonging in the Christian community can be more challenging and often takes more time. It can be scary for a woman to be vulnerable enough to share her struggles and to work through insecurities she has felt around other women her whole life. Most of all, it can be hard to truly put on the Gospel as her identity, trusting that it is through Christ alone that we belong to one another. Belonging is not through fitting into certain stereotypes of what someone says a Christian woman is or through meeting some purity standard. Belonging comes through our trust in Christ; because of this, believers belong to one another. Nothing else is required.
You Do Belong
A deep sense of belonging is the message we offer at Living Hope Ministries. As a result, I get a front-row seat to transformed lives as I walk with the women and wives of men struggling with same-sex attraction at LHM. As these women connect and see they belong first and foremost to Christ and then to one another, shame and fear slowly disappear, and as lies of needing to fit a particular stereotype are dispelled, I see these beautiful women walk more fully into who God proclaims them to be sharing themselves in ways they never have before. As they share honestly and vulnerably about their wounds and struggles, their hearts are knit together, strengthening their need for belonging and meeting the very cry of their hearts. It truly is an honor to witness the Lord at work in these women’s lives!
Over this past year, our in-person and Zoom support and online forums have provided a place to belong for many new women who have just found our ministry in 2023. As seems fitting with the year, 23 new women went through the intake process to join our groups over this past year, and dozens more connected through our online forums. We have welcomed them with open arms, reminding them that when we are “In Christ,” they belong. Because of the nature of our online support forums and Zoom groups, these women have established this sense of belonging regardless of their geography. We have women participating across the nation coming together first over a shared struggle but staying together because of who they are In Christ together.
As the new year begins, we are excited about what the Lord will do through the Women’s Ministry at Living Hope Ministries this next year. If you know of women (or men) who are struggling with their identity or sexuality, please have them contact LHM. Please join us in praying for the women involved in our ministry to continue to experience belonging in Christ together and for more women to reach out for the support they need!